Who's next for Chelsea?

Despite nudging Chelsea into the realm of big-time footy, albeit with an infusion of funds of speculative origin, Roman Abramovich has seemingly completed the task of turning Stamford Bridge into a new Siberia. And I don't mean it's Siberia because visiting teams never get more than a point there, but because the Russian billionaire has effectively frightened off any manager with any notions of reality. While we all knew Avram Grant's days were numbered since he began, most obviously by the lack of support from most of the squad, the Israeli's sacking officially labeled the club as not only a trinket for Abramovich, but a manifestation of his megalomania.

You can't criticize an owner for wanting to win it all. Abramovich was able to take a competent squad compiled by Claudio Ranieri, and added the key ingredient in Jose Mourinho. But unless there's another gaffer out there like the Special One, anyone who takes that job will suffer the same fate as Grant. If one can get in, win some silver and do it one's own way, then perhaps there's a chance. But if that's more optimism than reality, very few will hope to stay longer than perhaps a year or a bit more.

There's a lot of bleating on about how managers don't get enough time to mold their clubs into winning sides, almost as much as the is complaint about the high number of foreigners in the English Premier League. How does a potential manager get the chance to mold a squad with his vision, to get time to assemble a side that will compete? The short answer is that he doesn't.

Top flight management is more a mercenary occupation than ever before. Does Roman Abramovich really want to give a guy like Mark Hughes time to build a squad as he did at Blackburn? Of course not. In Abramovich's mind, he's one or two pieces away from what he wants: a dominant side both in England and in Europe. The manager isn't necessarily the visionary in this case, but rather another part of the machinery. As soon as Jose Mourinho ceased being merely a part was the beginning of his demise as Chelsea manager.

And that is why Inter Milan is so perfect for Mourinho. Serie A champions at a time when Juventus has yet to assert itself and AC Milan is in a rebuilding stage, there only remains the Champions League to be won. If Jose Mourinho cannot grasp the trophy with the Nerazurri, realistically who can? Sure, Massimo Moratti can be as tyrannical as the worst soccer despot, but it's highly unlikely that Mourinho is in it for the long haul in Milan. Inter are just another notch on the Special One's bedpost, another domino to fall in his attempt to conquer the continent.

Chelsea's future may seem muddled, but if Avram Grant can get the Blues to within three points of winning the league and into the European Cup final, you have to think Abramovich isn't worried about who the next manager will be. The notion of a club built and modeled on the vision of a great manager is gone. You can point to Sir Alex Ferguson with Manchester United and Arsene Wenger with Arsenal, but these are gaffers that are at the top of the game in the world. Considering the money at stake and the rabid impatience of fans, all that matters is silver, there's very little advantage of giving a manager time unless the goal is to establish a mid-table team as a consistent mid-table team.

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Adeus Jose

So the Portugeezer's finally gone, the result of Roman Abramovich's dissatisfaction with his gaffer's lack of "entertaining" play. I can understand where RA's coming from, when you've got Wenger's kids playing some sparkling stuff just up the road, but has he noticed how many trophies Arsenal has won in the last few years? Sure, we love watching the pretty, attacking stuff, but lifting some silver typically overshadows that, as far as history is concerned.

And who is there to step in as Mourinho collects his payout and moves on? Avram Grant, who does have a reputation for handling big names, if you can call any of Israel's players big names. But this is a guy who is essentially tactically the same as Jose Mourinho, albeit without the charisma (and the svelte figure in an overcoat).

We all knew something was stirring when the Schevchenko experiment seemed to blow up in everyone's face at Stamford Bridge, in addition to the hirings of Grant and Frank Arnesen, but it seems a bit foolish on the Russian billionaire's part. Sure, I know you have to whip it out and swordfight a bit when you're such a powerful guy, but c'mon . . . is losing arguably one of the greatest motivational and tactical managers in the English game for the last few years the way you want to turn it around and win "at least 2 European Cups"?

Unless another big name slips into Jose's seat (warmed by Grant), I'd be hard-pressed to bet on the Blues going any further than where they are now, and even then the turmoil at the Bridge has got Chelsea fans reeling.

The new man in the Chelsea hot seat [BBC Football]

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This Just In: Jose Mourinho Ain't Stupid

Have you ever commandeered a shopping cart at the store and stumbled upon a long-gone consumer's shopping list? I've been lucky enough to find some really interesting lists, profound not because of the individual ingredients, but the totality of them. For instance, the one I found that simply listed Robitussin, beer, razor blades and bleach pretty much leads me to believe that my own life might not be that bad after all. Of course, I'm not a handwriting analyst, so I can't tell what stage of desperation this particular shopper was in, or perhaps that he had a big day of window-cleaning and whites-laundering to look forward to over a case of suds.

I am reminded of this only because, by virtue of Chelsea's miserable display against Aston Villa over the weekend, we are blessed with an inside glimpse of Jose Mourinho's deft and masterful continental mind. Of course, all this means nothing, as most of the hoopla surrounding Chelsea's soon-to-be demise (Ballack and Sheva are out, as if that matters, and more importantly, Frankie Lamps' absence from his post in midfield actually exposed the Blues as an ineffective team coming up the middle without him. Despite the depth in Mourinho's squad, there is no wealth of weapons as in Liverpool, where Peter Crouch spends most of his time riding the pine). Unfortunately, there is no mention of anything to the effect of "Avram's a tosser", nor were there any Simpsons-esque renderings of Rafa Benitez in the margins of the Portugeezer's notebook (wide-ruled, with Hello Kitty beaming out from the cover).

Mourinho reveals restless mind in the absense of notable victory [Times Online]

Chelsea: Too small, but feels nice on the skin

No matter what you think of the Special One, he certainly has a way with words - I thought I was reading a quote from Ian Holloway, but with a bit more cognitive oomph behind it:

"It's like having a blanket that is too small for the bed," Mourinho said of his limited options. "You pull the blanket up to keep your chest warm and your feet stick out. I cannot buy a bigger blanket because the supermarket is closed! But the blanket is made of Cashmere! It's good."

With skipper John Terry set to return this weekend, perhaps we're seeing the end of the Blues' bad run of form lately, despite losing Ashley Cole to a knee injury. A double with Arsenal is what remains of future matches with fellow top-four clubs, and only six points separate them from Manchester United.

In more news concerning the vibes surrounding Stamford Bridge, former World Cup winning Italian coach Marcello Lippi throws his European man-purse into the ring as the potential successor to the Portugeezer.

Mourinho rues 'bad' Cole injury [Daily Telegraph]

Lippi: Chelsea would love me [The Sun]

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The Grab: 12.20

Love him for his irreverent sarcasm or hate him for covering one of the most competitive footie leagues, whilst enjoying the Italian experience, James Richardson will no longer be seen on these shores hosting Gazzetta Football Italia on GolTV. Richardson has been a long-time fixture in the Anglophile coverage of Italian soccer. Fortunately, you can still hear him on the Guardian Football Weekly Podcast. If you haven't had a chance to check it out, definitely give it a listen, if not for Richardson, then for the lads (and lady) they have on the show, some of whom put out The Fiver. [Guardian Unlimited]

Holy Jose! Mourinho actually apologizes to Everton's AJ after his best Arjen Robben impersonation. [BBC Football, SMiA]

Och, aye, I'm goon tae the fitba . . . Money doesn't buy you class in Edinburgh, apparently, as the Lithuanian businessman Vladimir Romanov gets on Hearts supporters tits. [Sporting Life]

The upcoming highlight for the second half of the Red Devils' season could be Henrik Larsson's arrival at Old Trafford. Will Sir Lord Alex fancy giving the smooth Swede a run-out against Lille? Hard to see him not doing so. [Manchester Evening News]

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The Grab: 12.12

Curbs in negotiation with Hammers for $3.4M [Telegraph]

Things aren't looking up for Sheva, and will the Portugeezer go shopping in January? Of course, Arsene Wenger has something to say. [The Independent, Guardian Sports Blog, Times Online]

More Wenger: Foreign players? Great. Foreign owners? Not so great. [Sky Sports]

"We're happy to be here . . . now if you don't mind, can you just give us the Cup and we'll be on our way . . . " Rijkaard claims Club America have an advantage in the FIFA Club World Cup.
[24-7]

How many satirical Mastercard commericals are being created as I type? Ah, what the hell . . .
Match tickets to watch your team play a boring 4-5-1 in World Cup qualifying? Several thousands of dollars. Watching FIFA do its best to emulate the most corrupt of third world countries as it controls the largest arena for the world's largest sport? Priceless. [Yahoo Sports]

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